Give yourself an excuse to play

It’s 5:30, and I’m cooking dinner. I glance up as my son darts from the living room and runs upstairs. Over the sound of sautéing onions and garlic, I hear prolonged bumps and heavy footfalls—for creatures that weigh less than half an adult weight, it’s impressive how loud running can be. Down the stairs and back to the couch, my son sprints, his arms full of stuffed animals. A new play activity begins…

A child needs no excuse to play. They are much closer to the base instinct of humanity. Humans learn, grow, and thrive through play. Even into adulthood, we require play to feel fully at ease and in a position to grow and thrive.

Play also promotes the creation of new connections [in the brain] that didn’t exist before, new connections between neurons and between disparate areas of brain centers. - Dr. Stuart Brown, Play: How It Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul

Why is it, then, that we feel like we can’t play?

Paradoxically, play is important for fulfillment, but can “endanger” survival. An animal engaged in play behavior may miss the predator waiting in the grass. Still, the evolutionary imperative for play continued and grew.

Adult humans have survival needs, but not nearly at the level of our ancestors. With that stress lowered, our creative instincts and need for additional fulfillment grew. “Mere” survival was no longer the keystone for the continuation of the species.

In modern society, we should seek deeper levels of creativity, imagination, physicality, and more. Instead, we do what we “must” for survival and then are convinced to mindlessly consume “content” or social media, because we are often beaten down by what it takes to earn what is necessary to continue our lives.

So, while we shouldn’t “need an excuse” to play, an external excuse gives us the nudge we need. And the truth is: an adult who can engage in play will have more energy for all other aspects of their life, much like an adult who exercises their body may be exhausted immediately after, but will slowly gain much more energy.

Let’s make some excuses…

• If you’re a parent, good fortune finds you! When your kid is playing, ask them about it; engage with them; ask if you can play. Your excuse: It’s good for my child!
• Seek an external pressure: attend a regularly scheduled game night; sign up for adult sports; attend a library lecture. Excuse: I signed up for it, I need to follow through.
• Learn something new: sign up for a class at your local community college; find an online course; practice a craft you’ve always wanted to learn. Excuse: This will help me grow!

These excuses are lovely, but in the end, we need more local opportunities for kids, adults, and families to engage in play.

After all, it’s how we learn, grow, and thrive.

I’m curious: If there were a dedicated space with daily events of different sorts of “play activities” (game nights, open mics, book clubs, knitting circles, and more) would you attend? If it had a large library of games, supplies, and tools, would you use them? Would you pay a small monthly fee for access? Would you donate your time, games, supplies or money?

Let me know in the form below.